Apologies to any Dubs left out, it was written in a hurry!

Liamwalkinstown (Dublin) - Posts: 8166 - 16/09/2013 15:45:26    1483018

I think we'v found our new Seamus Heaney ,

Twas the 23rd of September the Dub's they did throng
Around Croke in their thousands they waited to welcome SAM home
But on this day they were to be disheartened as Men from the West came with courage in their hearts and a steely determination to deny the Dub's and their celebrations ,

fortyfive (Tyrone) - Posts: 5929 - 16/09/2013 16:39:07    1483091

With our mouths all left a gaping, SAM departed Heuston Station,
Saying fare thee well sweet Dublin and the boys of Liffeyside!


Regards,

Snufalufagus....Laochra Gael

Snufalufagus (Dublin) - Posts: 8100 - 16/09/2013 17:22:22    1483139

Excellent post , very good.

AthCliath (Dublin) - Posts: 4347 - 16/09/2013 17:26:53    1483142

Nice own Liam : had to try one of our own!!! all good banter


It was in the year of 13 in the month of the GAA
When the gadflies were swarmin', dogs howlin' at the moon
With rosary beads and sandwiches for Croker we began
The Master packed his Jackeen phrase-book and jump leads for the van
Well, some of the lads had never been away from home before
'Twas the first time Yew-Tree set his foot outside of Knockmore
Before we left for Croker we knew we'd need a plan
So we all agreed that TheMaster was the man to drive the van

In Dublin the M50 'twas like the castlebar raod
There was every kind or car and van all carryin' the full load
Ford Transits and Hiace's and a ould Bedford from Ardnaree
With engine over heatin' from long haulin' duty-free
There were fans from Ballyhanuis, Ballycroy and Bonniconlon
On the journey of the lifetime and the crack was ninety-one
The Master met a Jackeens daughter on the banks of the river Liffey
And he told her she'd be welcome in Ballycastle anytime

As soon as we got to Croker we put the wagons in a ring
Maigheo Abu got out the banjo, Killer played the mandolin
There was fans there from everywhere attracted by the sound
At the first Fleagh Ceoil in Dublin, TheMaster passed the flagon round
But the session it ended when we finished all the stout
The air mattresses inflated and the sleepin' bags rolled
As one by one we fell asleep poor Master had a dream
He dreamt himself and James Horan sat down to pick the team

Master dreamt they agreed on Hennelly straight away
And Keegan, Vaughan and O Shea were certainly to play
But tempers they began to rise, patience wearing thin
James wanted Enda Varley, but The Master wanted Dillion
Then the dream turned into a nightmare, The Master stuck the head in Horan
Who wanted to play Willie Joe instead of an unfit Andy Moran
When the cock crew in the morning, it crew both loud and shrill
The master woke up in his sleepin' bag many miles from Nephin Hill

The next morning none of the experts gave us the slightest chance
They said the Dublin team would lead us on a merry dance
With those Jackeen flags all them Dub fans for victory were set
Until O Connor got the ball and stuck it in the net
What happened next was history, brought tears to many eyes
That day will be the highlight in many people's lives
Well Master climbed right over the top and the next time he was seen
Was arm and arm with James Horan, singin' revenge for Liam'o Glee

Now Yew-tree back in Knockmore, he's livin' with his mam
And James Horan has been proclaimed an honorary Mayo man
Do you remember the Jackeen's daughter on the banks of the river Liffey
Well didn't he show up in Ballycastle last week and...

2winjustonce (Mayo) - Posts: 65 - 16/09/2013 18:37:21    1483194

Mayo to win.

slayer (Limerick) - Posts: 6480 - 16/09/2013 18:47:52    1483200

Call me biased

But I prefer Liams.

Liamwalkinstown (Dublin) 1 v 0 2winjustonce (Mayo)

Advantage Dublin in the poem-off

waynoI (Dublin) - Posts: 13650 - 16/09/2013 18:52:08    1483205

Well done Liam brilliant. The new Poet Laureate!! Best of luck on Sunday, I'll be rootin' for ye.

OntheWhiteSide (Kildare) - Posts: 452 - 16/09/2013 18:57:55    1483209

Hate to admit it, but Liam wins. Great read

marty_mayo (Mayo) - Posts: 9 - 16/09/2013 18:58:36    1483210

It was September 2013
And Mayo were fit & lean
The Dubs gave it all they had
But they were left Samless & sad

slayer (Limerick) - Posts: 6480 - 16/09/2013 18:58:57    1483212

At least we can match ye in the doggerel stakes!! well done liam and towinjustfourtimes. Seamus Heaney was never in it with ye!

beal (Mayo) - Posts: 1388 - 16/09/2013 18:59:35    1483213

Superb post! Very witty indeed.

avonali (Dublin) - Posts: 1974 - 16/09/2013 20:06:45    1483266

Very good 2winjustonce!

hurlingdub (Dublin) - Posts: 6978 - 16/09/2013 20:14:59    1483270

We are the men from Norfolk! Norfolk! Norfolk!
We don't Drink! We don't smoke! Norfolk! Norfolk!

fortyfive (Tyrone) - Posts: 5929 - 16/09/2013 20:19:18    1483273

Well played 2winjustonce, well played :)

Liamwalkinstown (Dublin) - Posts: 8166 - 17/09/2013 09:06:52    1483365

2winjustonce - Well done good one. I would like to add that yew_tree aint from Knockmore though :)

I think Liam does win the poem for Dublin. Ye can have the poem though Liam ;) - we will take sam

yew_tree (Mayo) - Posts: 11227 - 17/09/2013 11:09:40    1483437

Ok this ain't my poem. It appeared a few years ago and was well written. Maybe someone know's who it is?


Choose Mayo

Choose pain, heartache, depression
Choose to place your faith in false gods adorned with tight shorts, false tans and braids
Choose whether or not to wear your county colours for fear of ridicule should you be at the wrong end of another hammering
Choose false hope at the start of each FBD Cup campaign

Choose Galway as the enemy, Roscommon as an annoyance, Sligo as soccer heads, Leitrim as your favourite underdogs
Choose to wish Padraig Joyce was born our side of the border
Choose McHale Park as mecca, Tuam as a hay shed, Hyde as a hell-hole
Choose to park in the old bacon factory, stand under the score board, watch the girls go by with fake tan dripping from the night before

Choose whether to travel up to Croker the day before or the morning of the big match
Choose whether or not to take home that Tipp girl you met in Rodys
Choose a big mighty fry before the match in your sisters place
Choose too many pints before the match

Choose the Big Tree after the match
Choose to go on the **** even though we lost again

Choose to hope that Maughan finally gets it right, O'Mahony hangs around if Maughan doesn't
Choose to forget Holmes but thank him for the league title
Choose to dream about what it would have been like if we had won in 1996, Choose to forget about 1997 and 2004

Choose to be a Garda, Civil Servant, Plasterer, Carpenter, Plumber, Electrician, Nurse
Choose a flat in Drumcondra, Phibsboro, Rathmines
Choose a house in Ballycullen, Carpenterstown, Lucan
Choose Rody Bolands, the Portobello, Flannerys, Coppers, McGowans
Choose the Manhattan, Giggs Place for eating

Choose to leave your place of birth at the tender age of 17
Choose to go to college in Galway, Sligo, UL, UCD or get the start with the big brother in Dublin
Choose only to return home for Christmas, Easter, the local town festival, Connacht Championship fixtures
Choose whether or not to apply for a job in the one local factory and accept half your current wage in the hope that life will be better than the rat race in the big smoke

Choose Cox's, Rockys, Mantra, Long Necks to drink
Choose Baxter, Volex, Coca Cola to work
Choose Breaffy House, Castlecourt Hotel, Hotel Westport, Pontoon Bridge, Downhill Hotel to get married

Choose Enniscrone for holidays

Choose the Westhern, The Cannacht Telegraph, the Mayo News, Mis Whest Radio

Choose long summer days in the bog, driving a tractor at 12, going to the local mart as a big day out
Choose your first car a souped up Jap import, on your mothers insurance, don't tax it until you are caught
Choose the site your father leaves you and to build a unimaginatively designed mansion on it

Choose the two teacher school for primary education, the big school in town for secondary
Choose to go down town for lunch, play pool in the pub, hope the convent girls notice you
Choose getting a pint in the local at 16, seeing your father in the local disco, thinking you scored because you kissed a girl
Choose to stand outside the church at Sunday mass choose, to always be a mammys boy

Choose Mayo

yew_tree (Mayo) - Posts: 11227 - 17/09/2013 11:16:01    1483444

Irvine Welsh's cousin from Kiltimagh maybe?

Liamwalkinstown (Dublin) - Posts: 8166 - 17/09/2013 12:27:43    1483518

That is great yew tree and Mayo all over. To many great lines to mention.

Mancirish (UK) - Posts: 2200 - 17/09/2013 13:15:55    1483585

"The Most Distressful County".....(by Snufalufagus)

"Oh the Green and Red of Mayo, weighs heavy on my heart,
Oh the Green and Red of Mayo, should just give up from the start,
Tis the most distressful county, that ever yet was seen,
They should ban all men and women from wearing red and green!....the red and green oohh!"

"Oh the Green and Red of Mayo, all born with two left feet,
Oh the Green and Red of Mayo, their a handy team to beat,
Oh they put their faith in false Gods, bleached hair and fake tan,
In the Tommy Murphy next year, they'll do the best they can!....the best they can oohh!"

"Oh the green and red of mayo, bridesmaid..never the bride,
Oh the green and red of mayo, ye can easy sweep aside,
Oh they blame it on an aul wans curse from nineteenfiftyone,
And with that excuse, sure whats the use...allows us to poke fun!!......to poke fun oohh!!!!"

"Oh the green and red of mayo, tis a county full of 'hype',
Oh the green and red of mayo, think for them that SAM is ripe,
Oh but history has shown us, tis in the final leg they fall,
And in a sorry line of green and red, back to the west they crawl....the west they crawl oohh!!!!"

"Oh the green and red of mayo, come again year after year,
Oh the green and red of mayo, they would move you to a tear,
Oh if Ballygowan was short on staff all they would have to do,
Is call up the lads from mayo, their an expert 'bottling' crew...oh, bottling crew oohh!!!!"


Regards,

Snufalufagus....Laochra Gael

Snufalufagus (Dublin) - Posts: 8100 - 17/09/2013 13:24:41    1483595