I think it is fitting to start this with a kerry theme! "Pat O Shea the Kerry coach is going walking his dog next week to get over Cork Loss. He has to learn how to hold onto a lead first"

happytobehere (Cork) - Posts: 360 - 07/07/2008 20:33:57    44260

just for fun---- what the difference between a kerry footballer and an alcoholic? an alcoholic wont leave 8pints behind him...


1 more--- Tomas o Flaterey was arrested in the grville arms in mullingar after the dublin match for destroying a cigeratte machine. apparently he was looking for 20players...

Rhodejim (Offaly) - Posts: 2888 - 09/07/2008 11:44:31    45479

Whats the diff between Eoin kelly and a mini bus? Mini bus can only carry 8 Eoin kelly has to carry 14.

scrawnban (Tipperary) - Posts: 4 - 09/07/2008 20:28:46    45967

happytobehere
County: Cork
Posts: 4

44260 I think it is fitting to start this with a kerry theme!

"Pat O Shea the Kerry coach is going walking his dog next week to get over Cork Loss. He has to learn how to hold onto a lead first"

Thats a classic even though last year was the first time i heard it..It was about Babs Keating!He even mentioned it on television!!

heres another that i experienced:
Overheard two Waterford fans having a smoke at half time in the all ireland semi final v Limerick last year. One said to the other "Sure if we give Kilkenny a ten point lead we will get destroyed!"


Did you hear about the dublin bra?

All support and no cup!!

athlaccalegend6 (Limerick) - Posts: 120 - 10/07/2008 01:27:09    46044

These are great does anybody have any more good gaa jokes, there was a topic on this a while back but it has since disappeared.

Clash-of-da-ash (Galway) - Posts: 927 - 10/07/2008 19:07:01    46572

A postage stamp was issued commorating the success of a well known team (cant name team) but it had to be withdrawn because the public didnt know which side to spit on.

Cavan_Slasher (Cavan) - Posts: 10253 - 10/07/2008 23:09:36    46612

Man sittin in hogan stand, all ireland final day empty seat beside him, man at other side says, you on your own, man replies the empty seat was my wifes shes dead, other man says have you no other members of your famiy who could take the seat, man replies i have but they are all at the funeral.

megs (Armagh) - Posts: 2 - 11/07/2008 00:13:44    46632

not great been from leitrim and slagging kerry people

kerry man was driving to croke park seen a sign "croke park left"
so he went home

fkm leitrim (Leitrim) - Posts: 88 - 11/07/2008 05:42:04    46661

Not a joke but one of the funniest " There wont be a cow milked in Finglas tonight " Keith Barr after '95 final.

chainsaw (Laois) - Posts: 712 - 11/07/2008 15:54:15    47128

After Mayo Dub semi 06:

"The Dublin team are switching to Red Bull, as 7up clearly doesn't work"

Or something to that effect :)

TheRevolution (Mayo) - Posts: 487 - 11/07/2008 16:20:12    47153

During the 'Langers' players strike there was one going around saying that Pope Benedict issued a decree saying that Cork are the most Religous county in Ireland cos they gave up hurling & football for lent!!

dubupnorth (Dublin) - Posts: 1897 - 12/07/2008 13:32:09    47305

I think it was 2004 and Waterford won the munster hurling title and their was blue and white flags all over the county, then the county council received a letter from some greek fellow who has holidaying in waterford and he was thanking the people of waterford for all their support of Greece in euro 2004.

DAVIE (Dublin) - Posts: 26 - 12/07/2008 19:45:33    47359

After last year's All-Ireland:

There was a car burnt out near Croke Park today. Gardai are questioning the Cork goalie to know where he was between 3:30 and 5pm !

PearseBro (Monaghan) - Posts: 459 - 12/07/2008 22:58:06    47387

After Cavan were knocked out of the Ulster Championship again: Bin Laden has just sent out a new TV message to prove he is still alive. He says "Cavan were brutal last Sunday". the Irish government have dismissed it saying that it could have been recorded anytime in the last 25 years !!!

PearseBro (Monaghan) - Posts: 459 - 12/07/2008 23:01:10    47388

Its an old story probably heard by everyone but it is brilliant. Cork were playing (not sure who against) and someone was continuosly shouting COME ON THE REBELS! UP THE REBELS! and some old boy a few rows back shouted down THE ONLY REBEL YE HAD YE SHOT HIM! like I say probably heard by everyone before but its a classic.

JohnMitchel (Dublin) - Posts: 178 - 13/07/2008 01:24:42    47404

HIS AND HER DIARIES, PAGE 1. SUNDAY. HERS; HE WAS QUIET, SUBDUED, JUST NOT HIMSELF. SOMETHING WAS WRONG. HE HASNT KISSED ME ALL NIGHT. NOT EVEN LOOKED IN MY DIRECTION. I THINK ITS ANOTHER WOMAN. I WENT TO BED AND CRIED. HE FOLLOWED ME UP LATER. I CUDDLED UP TO HIM AND STROKED HIS HAIR. HE LAY STILL. EVENTUALLY WE FELL ASLEEP IN EACH OTHERS ARMS. HIS ; MONAGHAN HAMMERED BY CAVAN AGAIN. TOTALLY GUTTED. HAD A GOOD NIGHT WITH THE WIFE THOUGH.

Cavan_Slasher (Cavan) - Posts: 10253 - 13/07/2008 18:02:03    47482

A Cavan footballer and his wife are in the house on a friday evening.
He jumps up and tells the women "Get your coat!".
She jumps up excited, asking "Are we heading out tonight?".
He replies: "No you're not, I'm away to training, and I'm turning the heating off."

mid-mon man (Monaghan) - Posts: 1680 - 13/07/2008 19:15:02    47496

Mick sees Paddy in the street and says to him; "Paddy, you should close your curtains and turn off the light when you are making love to your wife, all the neighbours were laughing at you last night ." "Well" says Paddy "the last laugh is on them because i wasnt even at home last night, i was away training with Monaghan."

Cavan_Slasher (Cavan) - Posts: 10253 - 14/07/2008 13:11:00    47880

Yeh ... that's a true story Cavan Slasher, it would never happen to you though ... it was in August of last year when we were still in the Championship!

FarneyBoy (Monaghan) - Posts: 151 - 14/07/2008 13:45:54    47938

Farneyboy, There is an old saying "Whats seldoms wonderful".

Cavan_Slasher (Cavan) - Posts: 10253 - 14/07/2008 18:53:00    48256