Edward was at school this morning and the teacher asked all the children
what there fathers did for a living.

All the typical answers came out, Fireman, Policeman, Salesman, Chippy,
Captain of Industry etc, but Edward was being uncharacteristically quiet
and so the teacher asked him about his father.
"My father is an exotic dancer in a gay club and takes off all his
clothes in front of other men. Sometimes if the offer is really good,
he'll go out with a man, rent a cheap hotel room and let them sleep with
him."
The teacher quickly set the other children some work and took little
Edward aside to ask him if that was really true.
"No" said Edward, "He plays Football for Westmeath but I was just too
embarrassed to say."

Rhodejim (Offaly) - Posts: 2888 - 07/08/2008 09:54:24    67443

Q: What do Kerry Footballers use for Contraception??

A: Their personalities.

BOOM-BOOM

jimbodub (Dublin) - Posts: 20763 - 07/08/2008 12:34:25    67699

What does CORK stand for - Couldn't over rule Kerry!
What does NAMA mean in Cork - No All-Ireland Medal Again! :)

KerryChamps (Kerry) - Posts: 1 - 29/09/2009 12:12:26    439611

CSI Meath had to be cancelled due to the lack of dental records and the fact that most of the DNA was the same .. and yes Moynalty and Carlanstown, thats you I'm thinking of

Con Cavan (Cavan) - Posts: 894 - 29/09/2009 12:44:41    439656

there's a good one bein txtd around at the moment - cavan to win a 2010 c'ship game.

kleenex (Wexford) - Posts: 392 - 29/09/2009 12:52:03    439668

What programme would you be watching if you saw a Dub holding Sam Maguire?.....Crimeline



Two old men fishing in a remote part of West Kerry. One turns to the other and says "Cork have lost again". The other replies "How do you know?" and he answers "Its a quarter to five!"



Tyrone farmer turns to his Derry neighbour in early spring, Paddy Joe have you sown' your spuds yet? Yes Mickey Joe why? Just making sure you have something to lift in September


The best joke of all though..... is Monaghan Football!!!

Gonzo (Cavan) - Posts: 55 - 29/09/2009 13:40:25    439729

did you hear the one about the westmeath man with the all ireland medal ?no didnt think so .

liffo (Offaly) - Posts: 649 - 29/09/2009 14:45:08    439819

Why is the Rover car company like Wexford football ?

Without ford they may as well close up shop.

ruanua (Donegal) - Posts: 4966 - 29/09/2009 16:52:46    439960

Aw dear these are all too funny :)

Orlaith (Derry) - Posts: 4282 - 29/09/2009 17:08:53    439989

Kleenex as funny as that one about cavan winning the 2010 all-ireland, it would be twice as funny it you put wexford beside it. that joke would be ok coming from a kerry or tyrone person but a wexford person i dont think so,

Gonzo (Cavan) - Posts: 55 - 29/09/2009 17:16:42    440001

A group of young students were walking down the road to college, when the happened upon a man in an Armagh jersey, riding a bicycle. one of the lads quipped "its amazing what they can teach them to do nowadays".

itsagoodin (Tyrone) - Posts: 2 - 29/09/2009 20:53:30    440275

why do meath players cycle ladies bikes? because they cant get their balls over the bar

finglas full ba (None) - Posts: 636 - 29/09/2009 21:10:24    440300

Two tipp men sitting in a pub in Urlingford in Kilkenny lamenting another bad year for their hurlers. One says to the other "What can we do to improve things at all"
Other fella says " I have a plan. Lets pick up a couple of Kilkenny women and bring them back to Tipp and we'll settle down and have plenty of well bred hurling children"
An old Kilkenny man sitting at the end of the bar overhears them, gets up and heads out the door. Just as its closing he sticks his head back in and says to the boys "Ye'd want to make sure the women are pregnant first before ye bring them over"

solo (Kilkenny) - Posts: 314 - 30/09/2009 12:47:08    440835

The Tipperary priest lay on his death bed and his last wish was granted. Brian Cowen and Diarmuid Kirwan came into the bedroom. "Come over here lads and hold my hands." They both obliged and each held a hand. "Father why do you want us to hold your hand?" Cowen said. "I wanted to die like Jesus..................with a robbing ******* on either side of me!"

Dave.ie (Tipperary) - Posts: 20 - 30/09/2009 13:33:43    440911

nice one solo....i liked that

Rhodejim (Offaly) - Posts: 2888 - 30/09/2009 14:00:54    440943

what do you call a cork man with an all ireland medal , a transvesite

kerryrowz (Kerry) - Posts: 833 - 30/09/2009 19:30:41    441287

finglas full ba take a bow. The best one so far!

whiterbannnas (Mayo) - Posts: 2441 - 30/09/2009 20:01:25    441307

due to continuing pitch invastions Croke Park have decided to go with PLAN C next year and give Kilkenny the cup before the game

wise_guy (Tyrone) - Posts: 1584 - 30/09/2009 20:28:16    441328

after the 94 all ireland limerick v offaly- why are limerick so magical
answer- because they dissapeared towards the end of the game

bigman2 (Tipperary) - Posts: 1202 - 03/10/2009 13:37:47    443782

What do you call a Mayo football supporter with big Ears

SHAM

ruanua (Donegal) - Posts: 4966 - 03/10/2009 14:16:24    443810