big ron thats rough

samin10 (Armagh) - Posts: 2434 - 16/07/2008 17:12:03    49834

how were the ailawee caves formed?

a cavan man dropped a penny down a rabbit hole..!!



why do cavan men like trousers with lots of pockets?

for peeling their oranges

mac11 (Mayo) - Posts: 463 - 16/07/2008 17:21:04    49846

An ex Mayo footballer went to Iraq to fight for Al Qaeda as a suicide bomber. He was ordered to blow up a bus. He burned his lips on the exhaust pipe while trying.

Cavan_Slasher (Cavan) - Posts: 10253 - 16/07/2008 18:14:47    49869

After John Fentons wonder goal from a midfield ground stroke some years ago against Limerick, a dispondent Cork fan approached a Munster council official after the game and complained saying that his seat was so bad he never saw Fenton's goal...

The official being a witty Kerryman smiled and replied "well, Tommy Quaid was in goals for Limerick and he never saw it either"!!!

Barn Owl (None) - Posts: 13 - 16/07/2008 18:22:27    49873

A Mayo woman with lipstick on her head. Said she was trying to make up her mind.

Cavan_Slasher (Cavan) - Posts: 10253 - 16/07/2008 18:26:21    49874

Not really a GAA joke but it might have happened on All Ireland day:
Two Dublin city business men were sitting down for a break in their soon-to-be new store. As yet the store was'nt ready,with only a few shelves set up. One said to the other,"I bet any minute now some thick Culchie is going to walk by,put his face to the window and ask what we're selling". No sooner were the words out of his mouth when, sure enough, a curious Corkman walked to the window, had a peek, and in a broad Cork accent asked"What are ye selling like".One of the men replied sarcastically,"We're selling arse-holes". Without skipping a beat,the Corkman said,"ye're doing well....Only two left".

Frances56 (Dublin) - Posts: 378 - 16/07/2008 19:05:49    49898

My goodness Cavan are havin a quare time of it in here aren't they!!

Niamh (Derry) - Posts: 2397 - 16/07/2008 20:29:23    49935

I hate they way they edit your post and make you sound like a freak!

Niamh (Derry) - Posts: 2397 - 17/07/2008 01:23:15    50055

An old man living alone in South Armagh, whose only son was in Long Kesh Prison, didn't have anyone to dig his garden for his potatoes. So he wrote to his son about his predicament. The son sent the reply, "For HEAVENS SAKE, don't dig the garden up, that's where I buried the guns!!!!!" At 3 AM the next morning, a dozen British soldiers turned up and dug the garden for 3 hours, but didn't find any guns. Confused, the man wrote to his son telling him what had happened, asking him what he should do now? The son sent the reply: "NOW plant the potatoes!"


===
It's a bit outdated, but worth a chuckle!

Niamh (Derry) - Posts: 2397 - 17/07/2008 01:23:53    50056

http://www.westcork.com/bantryblues/joke.html

not strictly to do with GAA but do the 3 mind puzzles at the end, I got all 3 answers right, really freaked my out!!

Niamh (Derry) - Posts: 2397 - 17/07/2008 01:40:27    50059

Work has been halted on the construction of a new shopping centre in Mullingar Co. Westmeath. During the excavation works an All Ireland Medal was found. The Fraud Squad have been called in to investigate..

Faithful_Fan (Offaly) - Posts: 34 - 17/07/2008 09:23:19    50115

I know Samin but it had to be done, they had a few pops! but a Offaly couple gets married and are on their honeymoon. The woman changes into a sexy outfit and lies on the bed. She looks sheepishly up at her new hubby and whispers, "Please be gentle with me. I'm a virgin."
The man gets up screaming, grabs his trousers and runs home to tell his father.

His father comforts him by saying, "Now, now. It'll be okay, son. If she wasn't good enough for her own family, then she isn't good enough for ours

BigRon1 (Westmeath) - Posts: 80 - 17/07/2008 09:39:10    50134

The GAA Virus

The Internet Viruses Council has just issued a warning which should be taken very seriously concerning viruses which may strike during the summer months - in Ireland in particular. This group of nasty viruses are referred to as "GAA computer Viruses" and are named and described as follows:-
The Meath Virus: Throws you out of Windows.
The Clare Virus: Memory forgets everything before 1995.
The Kilkenny Virus: Guaranteed to hit 5 times on the 11th of September 2000.
The Tribesman Virus : Appears and disappears on one Sunday in August.
The Kerry Virus: Five years of hard work wiped out by undetected Offaly mail.
The Waterford Virus: Not due to strike again for another 40 years.
The Colin Lynch Virus: Boots up some Waterford computers and carries on as if nothing happened.
The Ger Loughnane Virus 1: Virtually impossible to rid your PC of this one.
The Mayo Virus Family: Always billed as harmful, but really are nothing to worry about.
The Mick O'Dwyer Virus: Attempts to install lots of foreign programs to replace existing slow-running applications.

The Limerick Hurling Virus: Causes problems for 65 minutes then disappears never to be seen again.
The Babs Keating Virus: Enters a PC, attempts to delete all existing programs and reformat hard drive; when detected and removed it generates weekly log files citing errors in bits 8 to 15.
The John Maughan Virus: System crashes in September.
The John Leahy Virus: A particularly lethal virus. Users are advised to tie down the monitor as a precaution before approaching.
The David Forde Virus: Hasn't been seen since the "Michael Duignan Virus Killer" was invented.
The Michael Donnellan Virus: Attacks operating system and timekeeper and then deletes all records of this ever occurring.
The Offaly Virus: Often looked on as a benign irritation but strikes your OS as you are about to shut down. Often results in the firing of the General Manager of your PC manufacturer.

Ger Loughnane Virus 2: A continuous whining sound emitted from speakers, keeps generating data corruption messages, PC blows up but it won't accept any blame.
The Martin Lynch Virus: Computer pretends to go down, but then boots back up and is OK.
The Rebel Virus: Cheats your PC at vital time, plays outside the rules every chance it gets. Anti Viral solution being worked on by Loughnane Ltd. Rebel Virus to be put down 9/7/00.

Clash-of-da-ash (Galway) - Posts: 927 - 17/07/2008 13:03:51    50360

Q: What's the difference between Paddy Cullen and a turnstile?
A: A turnstile only lets in one at a time.

Q:What's the difference between a Dublin GAA jersey and a school uniform??
A:You can see school uniforms in September.

Q:What's Blue & White and goes beep beep beep?
A:The Waterford open top bus reversing back into the garage.

Q:How do you get rich in Waterford?
A:Save for the All-Ireland.

Q:What does the CCC stand for?
A:Central Cock-ups Committee.

Q:Whats the difference between the Mayo goalie and Cinderella?
A:At least Cinderella got to the ball

Clash-of-da-ash (Galway) - Posts: 927 - 17/07/2008 13:11:34    50364

Tpass fan there were no cups awarded after the match in Tullamore. Ye needed a blind umpire and a High Court Judge to win the only thing ye have ever won.

Faithful_Fan (Offaly) - Posts: 34 - 17/07/2008 14:23:18    50447

Here's one for ya if you want to win a free pint off the lads.

Of the 6 Counties, who has won the most All Ireland Senior Football Titles???






.........Kerry (Munster is the only Provence with 6 counties) wakey wakey!

RUBADUB (Dublin) - Posts: 477 - 17/07/2008 16:01:03    50561

i have a good joke 4 u .. mayo 2 win the all ireland

downmidfeilder (Down) - Posts: 86 - 25/07/2008 13:33:57    56799

ah now faithful fan.are ya getting touchy now?its a pity offaly has the odd bitter fool lke yourself.i ike many from westmeath were delighted to see your hurlers come back to the fore a bit this season.

depointswilcome (Westmeath) - Posts: 125 - 25/07/2008 16:43:02    57078

Just keeping this topic alive.

Clash-of-da-ash (Galway) - Posts: 927 - 06/08/2008 23:04:35    67286

depointswilcome
County: Westmeath
Posts: 33

57078
ah now faithful fan.are ya getting touchy now?its a pity offaly has the odd bitter fool lke yourself.i ike many from westmeath were delighted to see your hurlers come back to the fore a bit this season.
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And i "IKE" (whats ike??) many from offaly were delighted to see your hurlers been bet this season.

Rhodejim (Offaly) - Posts: 2888 - 07/08/2008 09:47:31    67439